I couldn’t help but notice that Fletch over at Blog Cabins complained that last weekend was the worst weekend ever. Really, Fletch? Did you look at the releases for this weekend?

Since I can’t recommend any films to you this time around, here’s something I can recommend: Wikipedia’s article on B-movies. Seriously, this is some of the most thorough, well-written, and entertaining stuff I’ve read in a long time. It also explains why no one really knows what “B-movie” actually means anymore. Pop some popcorn and read that, instead of going to the multiplex.

And now, since I need to fill up some more space…

Babylon A.D.
Wait, what? A French action movie starring Vin Diesel as a mercenary assigned to escort a woman who may be pregnant with “the next messiah”? Yeah, um…no.

Recommended if you liked The Chronicles of Riddick, The Children of Menor The Terminator (pretty much anything with “The” in the title, really)

Traitor
Wait, what? A spy thriller created and produced by…Steve Martin? Okay sure, why not? I can try to care about that.

Recommended if you liked Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid or that godawful remake of The Pink Panther (the only two other movies I can think of with both Steve Martin and espionage)

College
Premise That Might Have Been Clever Thirty Years Ago, meet Title That Might Have Been Clever Ten Years Ago. Get this: some guys are in college, and they get drunk and chase coeds! It’s totally gonna be hilarious!!!!!!111!!

Recommended if every title in your DVD collection begins with “National Lampoon Presents”

Disaster Movie
And finally, this thing. There was a time when this endless barrage of “parodies” (here put in quotes because the word “parody” implies humor and commentary) were an outrage of awfulness, inspiring hatred from the pen of every two-bit blogger out there. Now they’re just so much white noise playing in the background while you go see the The Dark Titanic (or whatever it’s called) for the nineteenth time, their existence essentially drowned out by their own irrelevance (the 21st-century equivalent of aPolice Academy sequel, if you will). If the one person who’s actually going to go see this movie is reading: Enjoy!

Recommended if you’re thirteen, have never heard of Mel Brooks, think that you’re clever because you know what a movie is, and can get your parents to drop you off at the multiplex without embarassing you too much in front of your friends. (But take off some of that perfume before you go out, young lady!)

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